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Sultan Nikolaev
Sultan Nikolaev

Download Mp3: Young M.A - Self M.Ade (Official Audio)

Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Fresh Brewed Live Sessions, Arkansas, New York Times, Cicala, Talkin to Breathe, Post Country, Dream I Had, House above an Apartment (2015-2016 Demos), and 3 more. , and , . Purchasable with gift card Buy Digital Discography $16.25 USD or more (35% OFF) Send as Gift Share / Embed 1. In a Diner in Poughkeepsie 03:04 lyrics buy track I'm afraid that I will one day yell too loud and I will blow my voice out and I will bleed out of my mouth and I won't ever talk again, I won't ever laugh again, and I won't ever sing again to a lover, friend, or crowd but I try not to think about things like that because I wanna be happy.I wanna be the smartest person in the room and I want everyone to notice when I am present.I wanna be laughing at a joke that Jimmy said in a diner in Poughkeepsie and I am surrounded by all my friends.I know that it must be hard for you to handle when she is drunk and you're alone and you just wanna go home.Just know that you are strong, stronger than me, stronger than I could ever be in this life but I try not to think about things like that becauseI'm gonna be happy, I'm gonna be the brightest person in the room, and everyone will notice when I am absent.I'm gonna be laughing at a joke that my best friend said in a restauraunt far away from here, surrounded by all my friendsBut just know that you got my attention. 2. 22 04:27 lyrics buy track When you're out of the city and you get out of your car, you can see the night sky and the stars and you can see exactly how goddamn small you really areAnd when you're on your deathbed and you're thinking of all the people you met and you're wishing you had spent more time with those that you love and you wish you had not been so nervous all the time. It only held you back from the places you saw and the good times and the times where you would fall and you would have to get back up but you would get stronger every time. Well I'm glad I don't have your lifeYou were born on the day that your mother had died and God knows that's a bad start to life and with every Christmas and every birthday you could not help but wonder what kind of person she was and if she'd like you and you would like her and if she was an artist then you would picture all the colors and schemes that she would show you when you were two, three, four years old. And I sit here and I write in my notebook and I think of what such a harsh life could show me. Could I learn from other's mistakes and manage not to repeat them?And I remember how lucky I am. I have my own family and my own friends and I'm able to do the things that I do on a wonderful day to day basis. But you grew up and tragedy take its toll but you met your wife at the local grocery store and eventually in your twenties, you had children of your own. One was named John after your father. He was a brave man in the war he had fallen in. And your wife chose the name for your daughter; her name was Emily. And you were happy and they were happy but once you got to working to provide for your family, the distance grew between you. It grew inches every day.And now you sit here while you're an old man and you tell me your regrets and you tell me your plans and how you would have lived life over again if you were given the chance. And I hope I can write to you. I hope that you're alive when I'm 22 and none of this matters and I am just happy and you'll see the day where you are proud of me. Stay alive. Life is hard but you've got a harsh life. 3. Post Tour Depression 03:50 lyrics buy track It's been more than a week since I've woken up in the same bed two nights in a rowI just get up to pee and then I go back to sleepBut I had a dream that I went from Asheville, North Carolina to Denver, Colorado and I made it there in less than seventeen hoursIt's been a little weird waking up and not having you right next to meI've been trying to fill the void with computer games and TVBut I wake up in the middle of the night to darkness and silence and I wanna scream because I haven't felt this lonely in so longI keep on expecting to wake up and write this songI'm not a perfect soul but I think I've been surrounded by perfect souls these days 4. F for Father 03:48 lyrics buy track Father I am not the person you pin me asI'm a liar, a thief, and I've made my own bedI've dirtied the sheets and now I need to restBut I can't and you know that it's not in my headBut if we could slow it down and turn time back, you know I wouldFather my conscious needs to be swept cleanUnder a rug or table is where it could beBecause it's sitting in the chair and it's staring at meMake it disappear so that I can be free'Cause if I was free, I could be far away from here and not next to youAnd he said "son, I already know"Father I find myself wondering a lotAbout other places where I am not'Cause if I take this guitar and the wood doesn't rotI'll be around some day when I decide to stopFather your words are needed this timeDon't you forget about the rest of this life 5. Sensitive and Fickle 02:35 lyrics buy track An eager test of time is the solution before we die because everything is temporary and you're not gonna wait for me.It's so sick and it's a bummer, it's the hottest day of the summer when you leave from work and you drink yourself to sleepWell I'm awake most of the night and if you wanna bother me or fight unfortunately I'm your manAnd if you wanna get some coffee, instead of your liver kill your kidneys well then I think I would understand.It's a signal of distress, it's that stress taken off your chest when you figure out that you're gonna die some dayAnd try not to watch the news because I don't want it to scare you because I know just how you are, so sensitive and fickle nowI may be young but I know I've been in love and you still have a lot to learnAnd you can say you're moving out and make your family cry and your boyfriend doubt, go ahead and tell yourself that's what they've earnedWe all have our struggles, we all try to stay relevant and you by no means are immuneSo I guess I'll see you around, but I hope that you can stay un-found because you're happier that way, I assume 6. Letter 04:40 lyrics buy track It took three years to write that letter to youIt took three months to find an envelope to send it inIt took three weeks to finally mail it out and send itAnd it probably took a week for it to reach youAnd it read "I am done with everything that this world has for me. I was lost but now I see and I could do that without you"Well it's not like I ever caredNowadays I found myself driving outFarther than I need to out of town where the roads roughen up but it's still the same countyAnd I am not reminded of you but every once in a while I think of youAnd I wonder if you're still in the same house and you're still with the same lover that you had before me and if he's treating you well and if he can keep you hornyWell it's not like I ever caredThere's a house that I used to live inAnd I try to occasionally visit them but you know me I'm stubborn and I don't cave in and I don't forgive people's sins too easilyAnd I am taking all the strides that I need and I am going about life as I pleaseAnd sometimes I found myself in someone's house that I've never met before and I am singing and playing guitar and they're listening and I feel adored and I remember the times where all I'd do is lay in bed with youWell I don't think that there's any one thing that I would change and I all I can do is hope that you're out there and you feel the sameWell I could say that I don't care but you know I'd be lying and you could see through it, just like you could see through meI only occasionally think of you but that doesn't mean that we were ever meant to be or that I miss you it just means that I can think back to all those fond memoriesOf us yelling in each other's faceOf the times I drove back to your placeOf the beach spent on a summer dayWell I don't miss you anymore and that's okayWell I don't wanna kiss you anymore and I think that's okayAnd if ever a friend of yours decides this message will relayWell then it's possible that you'll hear this song some dayIt took three years to finish this letter to you 7. Songbird 01:51 lyrics buy track I met you out last night after I got off work late in my work clothes hoping to not be seen by anyone else I knowExcept for you, you wrote my songs in a way that I couldn't write them myselfI was the recorder or the moderator, someone that you could tellAnd I never wanna get in other people's business but I find myself on everyone's shit list because of something that I did a million years ago and I forgotI forgot anything that I did before last week, I am constantly counting out all the times I singI am seeing everyone else in a better place than me and when my peers buy houses I'll still be waiting here to seeWhy a songbird can't just write it out and feel better in the morningWhy someone who's so gifted is always feeling so damn boringI will make it to your house tonight but I'll leave right awayBecause you're drunk and I know that you won't remember what I say 8. Wednesday in Waco 03:10 lyrics buy track I am driving around my drunk friends in Waco, Texas on a Wednesday in the month of MayAnd every step that I take is a step that I've never takenI guess nostalgia while you're traveling is rareI guess this foreign landscape in front of me is oh so bareI guess nostalgia while you're traveling is rareI try to learn from the mistakes that my parents made I think they both wasted a bunch of valuable time that's now goneAnd whether it was from drugs or just simply falling in love I think I'd rather see myself in a position where I can move onWhether I find myself in serving tables somewhere or exploring new placesI hope that whatever it is I can just move onI miss the way we'd talk before you were always away in a world of your own that is not hereAnd I know that you can blame it on your family and friends but you and I both know that you're better than thatAnd maybe it has been a rough couple of yearsBut as long as when we die we don't die here 9. 24 04:35 lyrics buy track When I was 24 I made the choice that I would eventually be free3 years later I was 27 and I made the decision completely and I quit a job where I was making 55,463 dollars every year since I was out of high school at 18 and I hadn't saved a dime of it, I spent all of my money hereAnd you're on my list of things to seeI write a song about you every weekWhen I was 30 I had seen most of the country where I happened to be bornI had no car because I sold it for money that I spent at the grocery store and over time I traveled west hitch hiking and bumming with no destination in mind and I began to wonder if it was all worth it by the time that I was 35And you're still on my list of things to seeI still write up a song about you every weekI still have dreams about you in my sleepAnd I still wonder when we'll ever beOn my 40th birthday, I was on the other side of the worldI had skinnied out and my shirt and jeans had hung past the ends of my curled and twisted body that was the skeleton of someone rational who had lived long agoAnd at 48 that person was a spectacle of someone who lived on his toesAnd you're still on his list of things to seeHe still thinks up a song about you every weekHe ran away from you well he's coming back freeAnd you and him will meet eventuallyWhen I was 50, I decided to rest and I went back to my old home townEverything seemed just a little too familiar like nothing had even gone down in 23 years of travelling nothing ever stayed the same which is why I was so confusedAnd as a 60 year old man, I can tell you that nothing in this life isn't amusingWhen you're someone who's on a list of things to seeGet the hell away from this cityAnd when I die some day know that I'll be freeAnd I want you to at least remember me about These are pretty much all the songs that either didn't make the record or are too young to be recorded professionally yet. I wanted to get some new songs out there before the next tour and the record won't be out for a while so here ya go. Thanks for listening. Sorry some of the tracks clip at certain points :/ $(".tralbum-about").last().bcTruncate(TruncateProfile.get("tralbum_about"), "more", "less"); credits released June 1, 2016 Thanks to Jimmy for letting me borrow his guitarThanks to my dad for letting me live with him $(".tralbum-credits").last().bcTruncate(TruncateProfile.get("tralbum_long"), "more", "less"); license all rights reserved tags Tags folk acoustic alt-americana guitar indie lo-fi Atlanta Shopping cart subtotal USD taxes calculated at checkout Check out about Quinn Cicala Atlanta, Georgia

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